As a child, my father liked the fact that he had someone he was able to command so to speak. He always told me, as many fathers tell their kids, that if I put my mind to it, I can be anything I would like to be when the time comes. The funny thing is with my dad, there were two restrictions. I could never be a police officer and never work at the Department of Motor Vehicle, as long as he was still breathing. I really never understood why not a police officer, granted, many of them are power driven hard- on’s just looking to meet their monthly quota, but not all cops are jerk offs. Who is to say why, my dad really just never had any good interaction with any police officer in the fifty years of his life, and he just did not want his son working for criminals. The best part is that, yes, the police are the criminals through his crazy eyes. On the other hand, I must agree with him, if you work at the DMV, the chances are you probably suck. I firmly believe Department of Motor Vehicle employees are not people. They just aren’t. If you disagree, then take your grandmother’s crochet hook and fuck your own ear with it. And if your skewed point of view, sheds even the smallest amount of truth, there is only one explanation. That explanation is the one man on this entire planet who can make any person in the right state of mind choose a career path at the DMV, and his name is not Trump, nor Putin. The person, really, is not a man at all but a creature haunting the lives of almost everyone in this world each and every fucking day. He fuels the demons and supplies the vices. This thing, if you would, has many names. He is the devil, and as much as Americana and folk lore has led us to believe, he has a vice of his own, which would be acquiring human souls. That is the only explanation to combat my argument, at least from my perspective. He has to be paying good too, otherwise I do not believe those emotionless cocksuckers would be so good at their jobs, but for the sake of argument, that is not the case.
The DMV Employees are fucking aliens, or at the very least something not included in what would be the classification of the human race. I was in one of the many of the DMV’s branches the other day, taking a sibling of mine to get her license, and that is where I truly realized that these people, are not people at all. They are not human beings. These employees do everything so perfectly, blending into our everyday reality, that the average human would never even ponder the thought of the “person” taking the picture for their license, flying here from a different planet or galaxy in a spaceship. Just think about it, next time you’re at the DMV, really just take a look around at the entire environment. Each and every person there is having an awful time with exception of newly licensed adolescents. All except the ones working. You cannot tell whether they’re enjoying themselves or contemplating death, they have no expressions at all and they look through you rather than at you when engaged in conversation. These extraterrestrial dirt bags really know how to fuck your mood up too, believe me, I failed my driver’s test once or twice, and the instructor had no problem making me feel like an object as they do to everyone else. That was years ago now though, and since then, I have been to the DMV many, many times but never realized who the people really are that lurk within the walls of every DMV building in America until now.
Regardless of what people want to believe, aliens are very real and they come from beyond Earth’s atmosphere not America’s borders. If you are a person who does not believe in aliens and think that this post is pointless, that’s fine because it is, but just remember your are an ignorant prick. Believing that humans are the only living beings in the universe is ridiculous, we have aliens running the god damn DMV. The Milky Way, is just a speck within a universe holding a countless number of galaxies, and countless number of possibilities. I finally came to a conclusion about why my father emphasized a negation towards my having any involvement with the DMV as an employee, not because of his hatred towards the place but because he was making sure I did not aspire to work somewhere that I could physically never meet the requirements for the job, since they hire aliens and all. In the end, I always knew the DMV sucked, but I was left with a critical thought. Are there really extraterrestrials living among the human race?